


Insomnia and Loss

by writing_out_my_inner_voices



Category: Dungeons and Daddies (Podcast)
Genre: Depression, Insomnia, Loss, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-13 13:09:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28778829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writing_out_my_inner_voices/pseuds/writing_out_my_inner_voices
Summary: Spoilers for episode 45-48. I haven't listened to episode 49 yet.In the middle of the night, insomnia and the agony of loss that has no origin keeps Nick awake.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Insomnia and Loss

**Author's Note:**

> Was having emotions about Nick and everything that happened in Glenn's most recent arc, episodes 45-48. 
> 
> Please don't read if you're not caught up. 
> 
> I haven't listened to the newest episode, episode 49, so this may be inaccurate. I haven't had the energy or willpower to listen yet haha. 
> 
> I've been sick since around October, and am only now starting to get to the point of feeling okay again. Sorry this is so short, writing has been hard lately.
> 
> But anyway, here you go, been wanting to write this for a bit, and finally got the motivation to do so. Hope you enjoy. <3 Lots of love to you all, and sorry I've been away.

The first loss was always something that stuck, settling into a soul like some sort of agony, like oil, tarnishing what was previously unmarred by trauma, by pain, by hurt, replacing it with the cruel reality that life could be just as harsh and dismissive as it could be beautiful.

Nick thought that would be the only time he felt it, when his mother died. 

He thought that perhaps he wouldn't ever feel that ache in his chest again, he'd _hoped_ he'd never feel this pain again. 

And there wasn't any reason for him to feel this pain now. 

_Right?_

So why did he feel so lost, with the night surrounding him, with nothing but the stars, the moon, the crickets hidden away in the tall grass near their camp, why did the darkness threaten to swallow him whole when he had so much more to be happy about?

Just hours before, he'd been laughing, joking, he felt alive for the first time in forever, it felt like. He felt like he hadn't laughed in years, even though he already knew he had, since his dad was the best. He knew that. He _knew_ that.

So why was this familiar ache there, why did that loss settle deep into his chest like a weight dragging him under tormented waves of an endless ocean?

Why did he feel like he was drowning again? Why, after all this time, did he feel so lost, so disconnected, so broken, all over again?


End file.
